on relationships

during my teenage and college years, i always had friends around me. it wasn't difficult to find to a group of friends to hang out with and identify with. to me, friends were an abundant... resource.[this terminology reflects how i took relationships for granted and how little value i placed them with...more on this later]

now that i've graduated college, married, and have had a child, many people have entered and left my life. Facebook gives the illusion that these people have NOT left my life and i feel i have bought into that illusion for a long time. out of all those hundreds of people that have entered my life, only a few have stayed. granted, multiple factors must align for a relationship to be sustained such as employment, location, interest, etc. and so many of these factors are indeed out of my control that i have once thought that the relationships i have in the present is a divine present.

because of the low number of people that have stayed, friends have become a scarcity.

on faith

it's been around 10 years since i've become a christian.  i've had a fantastic journey.  i experienced change and exponential growth as a part of kccc. i've served in local churches as a small group leader. in recent years, i've served as a deacon.

because of a lack of dependable workers, i've served in all sorts of capacities from incorporating the church, to signing the lease as a guarantor.

by now, i feel like i've seen and experienced both the glitters and pits of ministry and there is one thought these experiences leave me with :

our faith is a marathon, not a sprint.

the tragedies, difficulties, troubles, worries of this world indeed have the capacity to gnaw at our faith, slowly chipping away at what we once thought was indestructible.  

the struggle becomes more real and raw as time passes, and for some of us, the only remaining part of our once seemingly indestructible faith are scattered fragments.

how are we to keep our faith grounded, growing, and flourishing?

on the use of money as a christian

ever since becoming a full time worker and earning the wages of a full time worker, i've wondered about the proper use of money as a christian.

some obvious and well known pointers are :

1) do not worry about money
2) you have a right to spend your money
3) God allows you to enjoy good things
4) God wants you to be generous with your money
5) God wants you to help the poor
6) we are a steward of God's money.

The difficulty i have is with how to balance enjoying money(luxury) and giving it away.  I do not have a problem with giving money, but i often feel uncomfortable buying luxury items while i know that there are suffering people not only in the world, but in the communities i am a part of (primarily church - but also family, friends, etc.)

recently we gave $500 to a family member who was in urgent need of a car. the person used the $500 and some other money to put a down payment on a leased car.  When i saw her with the new car - smiling, glowing - i felt that that was the best $500 i ever used.

in instances like this, i feel like i should turn from every luxurious purchase and stick only to the necessities of life. but at the same time, i WANT some luxury.  I try to persuade myself that by being generous over keeping money for myself, i will be more handsomely rewarded in heaven.  however, i WANT that nice item.. is that want a greed? certainly that item is not a necessity..

there is a saying it is better to give than to receive.

what does that exactly mean? better for the giver? or the recipient? or everyone?

to give is a to parttake in the generosity of God, in his care for those less fortunate.